What can you do if your husband cooks for himself but not for you?
How do I involve my husband in cooking?
My wife had a solution to this. She told me I couldn’t eat unless I helped with the cooking. WELL naturally I didn’t believe her but it turns out that she was serious. That first night, she cooked dinner but didn’t let me have any. I had had a big lunch that day so I didn’t mind much. That night I figured “Okay, this is a one night thing. She will forget about it tomorrow”
WELL the next morning, I went downstairs (she made me sleep in the guest room upstairs) and tried to open the cabinet to get some bread for toast. I pulled the door but it didn’t open. I looked and noticed that Clair had put locks on all the cabinets. When my wife woke up I asked her about the locks. She told me exactly what she had said the night before, that I couldn’t eat unless I helped with the cooking.
WELL I wasn’t about to start cooking (my mistake). I figured I could grab food on the way to work. Sure, she can stop me getting food at home but she couldn’t stop me getting an egg mcmuffin. When I pulled up to the window and reached for my wallet to get a credit card out. I passed it to the woman in the window. She swiped it, but it didn’t go through. After not going through once or twice she looked at the card, then up at me and said “Sir, I think this is a Sephora gift card” I assured her she was mistaken, but when she handed the card back to me, I saw she was correct.
MY WIFE HAD CUSTOM SEPHORA GIFT CARDS PRINTED WHERE THE IMAGE WAS A PICTURE OF MY CREDIT CARD.
Naturally she took the cash out of my wallet and even the coins from the coin tray in my car. I told the woman at the window that I had no money on me but I could pay her later. This didn’t fly with her. I figured I could get food from the guy I always get lunch from, he would let me run up a tab.
WELL I struggled my way through work and ran over as soon as he opened. I asked for the usual and if I could pay him tomorrow as I had forgotten my wallet. He told me that my wife had actually called and asked him not to do that. He told her it didn’t make sense to him why he shouldn’t so he made me my tuna melt and let me put it on credit
WELL That night I got home and told my wife of my success at getting food during lunch and informed her that she as of yet had not succeeded at stopping me from eating. Man, you should have seen her after I said that. She was FURIOUS. She stormed off, slammed the door to the bedroom and came out a few minutes later in different clothes and went straight to the car and disappeared for awhile.
WELL the next day, I figured I would do the same lunch scheme, maybe see if I could get something for dinner too. My friend at the sandwich shop told me that my wife had visited him last nite and she was very “convincing” in her reasons why he shouldn’t make me food. I pressed him as to why, but he only ever told me that she was “convincing”.
WELL I tried a few other ways of getting food, but she managed to thwart those too. The only thing I didn’t try was a soup kitchen but I am NOT going to stoop to that level even if it is to win this little fight.
After about two weeks of this, I finally caved, the hunger was so bad I couldn’t sleep and I was so dysfunctional that my boss had asked me to stay home until I was better I went downstairs in the morning (she had kicked me out of the bedroom for this whole time) and I told her that I was going to make us both breakfast.
WELL she lit up at this, I have never seen her so happy in my life. It wasn’t fancy and I burned my self more than once making the eggs (fine motor control goes with extreme hunger). Ever since then I have been helping my wife cook and the locks have stayed off the cabinet.
I started out very stubborn on the traditional roles, but I actually really enjoy cooking now and am even considering night classes to learn to be a real chef. Apart from marrying my wife, getting into the kitchen has been the best thing that ever happened to me.
For years my wife has been making dinner for me but I came home last night and out of the blue she said I had to make my own dinner. I asked her why and she just told me she's tired of cooking for me. What should I say?
I was the family cook from 12 years old. And OMG is gets so very thankless.
I left at 19 and got married when I just turned 20. Am 62 now. Have been cooking for the family for 50 years.
holidays were a nightmare. I am vegan, my choice, but I had to cook meat. Then there were two diabetics, two alcoholics, one coeliac, one vegetarian. One insisted that no seasoning was added. One insisted that veggies were almost purée. A lot for a child to work out, and so many complaints.
my own children were permitted two food items that they were excused. Just two each. I was not going to cook several meals each night. They both only have one, but they have flown the nest, no longer my problem.
My husband has always been polite and thankful for any meal made. But about a year ago I started to ask him what he would like for dinner, I just wanted someone else to take the pressure, but after two weeks he just said I really don’t mind just whatever you fancy. But that wasn’t the point, I had been working out meals and menus for fifty blooming years I was just sick of it.
He arranges the meal a couple of nights a week now. I really do not mind that it is take out or pasta. I just don’t have to think about it.
I do sympathise with your wife, perhaps you could learn to cook and take some of the pressure of decision from her.
If your husband rejects your food over a little misunderstanding and goes to bed hungry, as a good wife, what will you do?
You are his wife, not his mother. You have provided the meal and if he wants to behave like a child and not eat it, that is his problem.
As a mature adult, he should take steps to talk and clear up the misunderstanding and not go into a sulk and expect his wife to pamper him. You are equals. Ignore such stupid tantrums else you will be running behind him all your life while he makes no attempt to see your point of view.
Let him sleep over it. Talk about it over breakfast.
When your wife quits cooking and cleaning the house entirely, is this a sign for a break-up or is she depressed and she'll get over it and start doing it again?
The only thing it's a sign of, is that YOU (presumably “the man”) need to Step-up, before she steps back out of your life.
It is not “Her job" to cook and clean for you. It's her job to take care of herself, you are not her child.
When my husband expects me to serve him a food plate, and I think this is so controlling, how should I deal with it?
Honestly I am getting pissed at my husband. I take care of the house,grocery shopping, meals, animals and yard. I make ALL of his meals on weekdays because I know he works hard, but the weekends he is complaining about being hungry. I think get off your ass and make your own food. Don’t we all deserve a weekend off? We work all week, can’t I get a damn break? I asked him today “what did you do before me”? Well, he cooked and cleaned and BTW he is a great cook, but now can’t seem to find the kitchen. Now since he has me, he expects me to do it all, everyday, every meal. I worked full time, came home and did all housework and help him on all his “projects”. He sits in front of the TV while I do the rest. WTF? I worked all day and have to work all night and on weekends, 7 days a week while he has time to rest? Feed your damn self if you are hungry and clean up afterwards! It’s pretty F’ing easy, but don’t expect me to clean up after your ass. YOU are hungry, are capable, sometimes you need to feed yourself! Make a damn sandwich for yourself! Or, how about taking us to dinner ONE night?
My husband didn't like the dish I cooked and he threw the plate against the wall. He then made me clean it up and kept insulting me. Is this normal behaviour?
No. There's an old joke.
A new bride is being driven home in a buggy by her new husband, and the horse stumbles. The husband gets off and whips the horse and says "That's 1!" He climbs back and they continue. A mile later the horse stumbles again and the husband gets off again and whips the horse again and says "That's 2!" He remounts and they ride on. Down the road the horse stumbles once more and the husband climbs down, pulls a gun and shoots the horse dead. The new bride says, shocked, "How could you do that to that poor innocent animal?"
The new husband turns to her and says "That's 1!"
You are the bride, the pasta is the horse, and you need to make serious alternative plans.
My husband comments negatively on my food and everyone who cooks for him. How should I react? I feel hurt. What should I do?
A lady I use to know told me how her husband would often tell her with the first mouthful of whatever she cooked that it tasted like dog food and throw the plate across the kitchen, smashing it. Leaving her to clean up the mess while he either left the house or made himself a sandwich.
It didn't matter what she cooked or how long she had spent cooking it, he would brutally degrade her, because he was an arrogant pig who was just in a bad mood so he'd take it out on her like that.
One day she just didn't feel like she could face another evening of aggression, degredation, having to clean what she spent time preparing off of the kitchen cupboards or hearing once again that her cooking tasted like dog food…
So she bought a can of dog food. Emptied it into a pan, cooked it and served it up to him on a plate.
Hilariously but sadly at the same time —she said after his first mouthful of dog food he paused… then told her that for once she got something right because he actually liked it!
She said she just burst out laughing and couldn't stop —by the time she had composed herself enough to speak he had finished what was on his plate and was wanting more!
It gave her a new found strength. She told him it was dog food without a fear for the consequences. While he sat there with a stunned look on his face and absolutely lost for words she proceeded to tell him how much of a pig he was and she was leaving him.
Her new found strength somehow disarmed him. Took away his power so to speak. He wasn't use to her taking a stand and sticking for herself.
She had the last laugh.
31.03.22 - Amazing… so many upvotes considering most of who commented think i made the whole thing up. Wish id never shared it in the first place.
What would you do if your husband told you that he expects you to make him a completely different meal if he does not like the meal that is made for family dinner?
My grandmother had the perfect response to this. My grandparents hadn't been married long when my grandmother made my grandfather a pie for dessert. Now, you need to know my grandmother was educated at an elite girls school where she was taught, among other things, to serve tea to the Queen. In college, she majored in Classic studies. Making a pie was not in her wheelhouse, but she wanted to please her new husband. Grandpa to one bite and said that he could do a better job at making a pie. Grandma was hurt, but calmly said “and so you shall!” They were married over 70 years. She never made another pie.
What makes your husband a good husband?
I met him when he was 39 and I 33. He had never been married and I had been. I had three children ages 7 to 12. I thought “he won’t commit” but I was still intrigued. A year later, we were living together. Five more and we were engaged. He had all the assets and I had all the liabilities when we met, but he never held it against me. He was supportive and took to the kids like they were his own. He took my son to little league and my daughter to ballet. He ferried kids around including their friends and made dinner for all of us when I had to work late. Whenever they got in trouble, he kept his cool. We survived and thrived.
Now, whenever an opportunity arises, I tell him he has already given me the most wonderful present a woman could want. A great husband, and the best father my children ever knew. Their natural father was a deadbeat dad who moved away and didn’t support them either financially or emotionally. My husband is the man they think of as their father. They are all in their late 40s and early 50s and they let him know how much he means to them. If they need help fixing something, he will go and help even though it means travel and inconvenience. They call him as often as me.
He has told me many times, he would do it all over again. That’s nearly 40 years of a commitment to me and my three children. Not only is he a good husband, he is a good father and a phenomenal human being. I am the luckiest woman in the world.
You can’t change him.
You can ask him why he never cooks for you (of course this may open a lot of issuesthat are not on the table … yet .. so be sure you are ready to work on the issues).
You can make sure you don’t cook for him either .. although this is not the kind of tit-for-tat that builds a strong marriage. It would probably be better to just stop the battle and leave your marriage is that is how things get done.
You can accept that he doesn’t cook for you and stop making it some “Sign” about something.
You can get a divorce.
You have a lot of options, but I suggest you think your options through before you decide.
What do you do when your spouse cooks a meal for you and you don't like the food?
My cooking is sometimes a bit hit-and-miss. If I've cooked something new, my husband and I have an unspoken rule for dealing with the fact that my new recipe may have not been that successful:
- If he likes the meal, he'll be very vocal about it.
- If he is quite quiet, I'll say something like “Should I buy the ingredients for that meal again next week, or should I maybe buy the ingredients for that other meal we had” (here I'll refer to a meal that I know he definitely likes). If he actually did like the meal I've just cooked, but was just too engrossed in enjoying it to be vocal about it, he'll say something like “Oh yes, definitely buy the stuff for this meal again… it was amazing!”. But if he was being quiet (ie. not enthusing about how great it was) because he didn't like it, he'd respond by saying something like “It was really nice, but that other meal you did was even NICER!”.
This may seem overly complicated to some people, but it works for us (and we've been married for 24 years). My husband is way too polite and worried about hurting my feelings to outright say he doesn't like something I've cooked, so this little dance gives him a subtle way of letting me know.
Of course, this method probably isn't that useful if you don't like ANYTHING your partner cooks!
EDIT: Just wanted to add that my husband is a great cook and we both share the burden of cooking meals!
My husband hasn't cooked a meal for me for over 20 years. I'm tired of always having to do all the cooking. What are some ways I can encourage him to change this behaviour?
You have made a rod for your own back. Go and stay will your sister etc for a week and ask him to look after things. Say you are coming back on a particular evening and he can make you a meal. He has all week to practice.
Men who say things like “I don’t know where the washing machine is” or “I can’t work the cooker” are just pathetic. If you were gone he would have to learn pretty damn quickly.
How can you effectively respond when your husband, wife, or significant other cooks something you don't like, have you solved this challenge, and is there a system or process to avoid this prospective conflict long term?
It seems pretty simple to me.
1. Always show gratitude and appreciation when someone cooks for you. They have expended effort so you can eat. That's a big deal.
2. Bring realistic expectations to the meal. This isn't a three-diamond chef engaging in expensive artistry. It isn't going to be perfect, and you shouldn't demand perfection.
3. If the meal isn't to your liking, give mild but constructive feedback. "I thought it was a little too salty." "I don't care for green beans." That sort of thing.
4. If they seem hurt, acknowledge that. "Did I hurt your feelings? Sorry! That wasn't my intention."
5. If that isn't enough, and they're still upset, then you may need to have a serious conversation. What's going on? Should you do something different when you don't like food they've made? Different phrasing, perhaps?
Ultimately, I don't think you should marry someone who can't take polite, constructive criticism in stride. If you've ended up married to someone who can't cook food you like and won't adjust, then I guess you'd better learn to cook yourself, or get used to food you don't care for.
What is something your husband cooks better than you cook?
My husband takes charge of the kitchen section when I'm on periods.
It's his duty to feed us and he does it perfectly.
He is the best in preparing Sambar.
Our kids love his Sambar to such an extent that they say..
“Mom we have to wait for one more month to taste sambar like this”
My husband's face will be glowing, hearing this comment.
“You are most welcome to prepare sambar for your kids daily” I reply sarcastically.
“No need, because of your sambar only I'm getting the credit” he gives back.
We all laugh loudly.
What do you think about a husband who does most of the cooking and cleaning?
The same thing I think about a wife that does most of the cooking and cleaning: “Okay, that’s a rather uninteresting fact.” Maybe he likes cooking and cleaning. Maybe that’s just how the chores got divided up in his marriage. Shrug.
My wife and I both clean, but I do most of the cooking. This is because my wife hates cooking, but I don’t mind it. So it makes sense for me to do most of it.
My husband said that if I do the dishes all the time, cook every day and keep the house clean at all times, our relationship will get better. Is it worth a try?
Tell him if he does the dishes, cooks and cleans at all times your relationship would be better, see if he is interested in trying.
How can you tell if your husband likes your cooking or not when he never critisizes it or tells you what he likes?
If no news is good news, then no criticism means he likes what you cook.
Since my husband's office is not too far from home, he comes home for lunch everyday. Most of the time he is so preoccupied with attending work related calls and office work, that half the time he doesn't know what he is eating. Only if it's too spicy or salty he will comment, else he will just gulp down what is put in his plate and go back to office.
Night he will ask: what is the curry today?
Me: same as in the afternoon.
I usually make enough for both lunch and dinner.
Husband looking blank: I forgot what it was.
I tell him and then he is like “ oh yes yes, I remember now".
Me after he has started eating : How is the curry?
Husband looking surprised: it is okay.
Me: hope it is not too salty(me fishing for compliments)
Husband: no, it's ok.
Realizing the futility of waiting for compliments, I directly ask him: is it good?
It finally flashes in my husband's mind what I am trying to ask.
Husband: oh its super.
So you see it's only if I ask him directly I will get compliments else nothing.
So most of the men I know don't comment on their wives cooking, if they value their lives and their peace. Because if he says it is not good then sometimes the wife will get angry and the next 2 days he may have to do the cooking or he will have to apologize and try to make up in other ways for his criticism.
Also many times their mind will be elsewhere while eating and they don't know what they are putting in their mouth 🙄.
So you may have to tell your husband that you want his feedback on your cooking everyday.
You may also have to remind him when he is eating and directly ask him whether he likes your cooking or not.
But be prepared to take both criticism and praise.
What are your thoughts on a husband not knowing how to cook when he has a wife who can and will cook for him, even though she works outside of the house?
I believe that everyone should learn to cook regardless of their gender.
Cooking is a basic life skill.
I learned to cook as a child. I learned to cook basic foods at first, boiling an egg, making a hot drink. Making a very basic meal.
Then I learned to bake bread, roast meats and prepare more complex meals from recipe books. By the time I was twelve I could cook a full dinner from scratch.
I cannot imagine not knowing how to cook. I am now sixty-one years of age, and earlier this week, it being Christmas 2022, I worked with my wife on preparing our contribution to a family Christmas dinner. We just prepared some snacks and vegetables, each family group preparing oneo r two dishes to build a full dinner. It’s part of my wife’s family tradition.
Normally I assist my wife prepare meals for the week on Sundays. I cut and peel vegetables if needed while she looks after the finishing, cooking or preparing the servings.
Why does my husband think it’s okay to come in with muddy boots?
I have a solution for this. I have a piece of tarp in my garage. If I’m mowing the lawn, digging, gardening or whatever and my boots become real dirty, I rinse them off and leave them to dry on the tarp.
Just do that at your house. Simple, problem solved.What do you do if your husband asks you to cook like his mother?
Thankfully I don’t have that situation. But in winch case, I’d probably ask my MIL how she prepares food that makes it unique
How do I get my husband to cook for me?
Easy one. I have been married three times and none of them knew how to cook. So I learned to cook myself out of self-preservation. I’m sure if you cooked as badly as anyone of my wives, he would do the same.
What are some reasons why my husband might not like my cooking?
Because he wants to put you down. Just another ploy to make mean remarks about, to make you feel hurt. I quit cooking when my husband took over the kitchen and grocery shopping. He would not eat what I fixed, tore into the kitchen, messed up my cupboards so I couldn’t find things, shoved me around in the kitchen, meaning there wasn’t space for both of us, and then he’d tell others I didn’t cook; another comment to make others see me as less and, then, poor him. He wouldn’t want me to grocery shop. When I did, he’d take my selections out of the cart and put them back, saying we didn’t need them.
Would you cook for your husband every day?
Interesting A2A. I will risk saying that there is no Moroccan woman who would not do it. In fact, she is not going to cook everyday but she is going to cook everyday and more than once a day and with a lot of love and care. We are brought up this way. We saw our grandmothers and mothers cook to their husbands everyday as a statement of love. You know that our women are not accustomed to express their feelings openly even to their husbands but they surly show it in the kitchen. And that is how our Moroccan men get big bellies and fatty bodies:)
So yes I would and nothing would stop me unless he is on a diet lol.
Is it reasonable for a husband to be angry with his wife for not cooking for him?
Did she agree to cook that meal for him? It's reasonable to feel angry when someone says they'll do something, and then they don't. That will frustrate just about anyone.
Of course, it's generally a good idea to ask whythey didn't follow through on their agreement — unexpected things happen, and sometimes we can't do everything we agreed to do. Don't automatically assume she just didn't give a damn. Assume something unexpected came up. Kindly ask what happened and listen patiently to the answer. Empathize. Be prepared to roll with the unexpected and allow for human frailty. The fastest road to disappointment is expecting perfection.
If she never agreed to cook that meal for him — if, instead, he assumed she would be cooking for him all the time simply because she is his wife — then his anger is not justified. He should sit down with her, and they should spend some time discussing his goals and her goals for the marriage, so they can figure out if they're really on the same page. Ideally, that should have happened before the wedding. If it didn't, there's no time like the present.
Why won't my husband learn how to cook? I feel overwhelmed at the cooking responsibility that I am being forced to shoulder. We've been together two years, and this issue is driving us apart.
One reason my wife and i have been together for 50 years is that we learned early how to share. Share the chores. Do your own laundry. Take turns sweeping the floor. Take turns cooking. No one likes to cook all the time. At times, my wife worked longer hours than I did, and later hours, so I got into cooking most of the time. I watched Emeril, Jamie Oliver, and other cooks to get the idea and recipe ideas. When she had time, my wife would cook dishes that she liked to make. Since then, I have perfected a few dishes like Chili with cornbread topping, Beef Stroganoff, Lasagne, Mac and Cheese, and several kinds of fish including Teriyaki Salmon, Baked Cod, and pan fried Rainbow Trout.
Show your husband my response and tell him that I say real men can cook. If he refuses to cook sometimes, then I don’t think he has the right attitude towards you. He expects you to serve him? Sorry, in a relationship no one serves the other. No one is is servant.
What should you do if your husband expects you to cook every night even though you both work full time and you have a longer commute?
Absolutely not! This is ridiculous. Whoever gets home first needs to start dinner and then you both can work on it together. Or, you might want to pick certain nights that each of you are responsible for dinner. He has lost his mind if he think dinner is your responsibility alone.
Do you commonly argue about "what we eat tonight" with your spouse?
No, because I mostly cook for both lunch and dinner in the morning itself.
We never argue about “what we eat tonight” or at any time. This is because both our families have faced hard times when we were young and we are used to eating what is put on our plate. Especially my husband. He respects food and usually doesn't refuse to eat whatever is cooked.
I decide. I cook. All eat. Simple funda. Anybody doesn't like what I make are free to cook what they want. I have said I'm ready to eat whatever they cook because I don't mind taking a break from cooking. But nobody here wants to do that, so they eat what I cook.
So no arguments about cooking or eating.
How can I kindly convey to my husband that he's not a very good cook?
Your husband cooks? How nice of him! I’ve got a great idea: On the next gift giving occasion, give him a set of cooking classes. There are classes for virtually every type of cuisine. Don’t (God forbid) tell him he’s bad at it. Give him classes bc “I know how much you enjoy cooking so I thought you’d enjoy this.”
What can be done if your husband doesn't like the food cooked by his wife, and asks for something else to be cooked every time?
I would point him to the kitchen and invite him to make his own meals. I am not a short order chef.
Fortunately the one time my husband didn’t like something I cooked. he didn’t ask me to make him something else. He went to the kitchen and made himself a meal. That is how I found out he doesn’t like spaghetti. A rare event like that and I would have been happy to make him something else. Every time? He gets told directions to the kitchen.
Can I stop cooking for my husband?
Can I stop cooking for my husband?
I don’t know. Can you?
(Damn. I can’t resist. Sorry)
Can you stop cooking for your husband? Of course. Why? Did he hire you as a cook or marry you? If you think he should do some of the cooking, suggest kindly that he get up off his egregious ass and go take a cookery class. Cooking is one hellovalot of fun. I love cooking! It’s so nice to be able to poke around a farmers’ market and come up with new ideas and try out new stuff. And damn - sometimes it turns out so good we all overeat and lie around groaning…
Any guy who thinks cooking is unmanly has never been in a proper professional cooking establishment. There are some really great women chefs, but they are sadly under-represented. Watching “Chef’s Table” on Netflix can be a real eye-opener in this regard. There are some women doing fantastic work in restaurants, but all we generally hear about are Gordon Ramsay, Jamie Oliver, Paul Bocuse… Where are the women? Meta Hildebrand? Yes!
When you talk to your husband, you need to negotiate. If you enjoy cooking and see that as your domain in the house, then you aren’t going to be happy that the hairy guy is poking around in your pans. But if you want to be cooked for as well as cook for someone, then you need to talk. Yes, you can change this sort of division of roles, if you want to.
There’s no law forcing you to cook until food-poisoning doth you separate…
Are there really husbands who know how to cook?
I had no idea that having a penis exempted you from having to cook. Where can I get one?
He's a selfish person. Deal with it!! Tell him you would like some food also!! You must have known his ways during dating phase and then you married him.
What do you do when your spouse cooks a meal for you and you don't like the food?
Why does it irritate me when my wife asks me what to cook for dinner?
She knows what ingredients we have in the fridge. She cooks very well.
I’ve told her subtly multiple times that I like surprise food when I get home.
My girlfriend cooks amazing dinners for me almost every night, but still wants me to take her to restaurants even though I buy all the food to cook.
How do I let her know that's not fair?
My husband comments negatively on my food and everyone who cooks for him.
How should I react? I feel hurt.
What should I do?
How do I deal with my husband, who only cooks for praise from guests who come over for dinner? He does this under the pre-text of "helping me".
But he doesn't "help me" on other days even when I'm cooking 3 times a day.
How do you tell your husband that you hate his cooking?
Is it normal for a husband to never cook and also not express what he wants to eat?
What would you say if your partner cooks and the taste is bad?
How does a husband tell his wife that she is a bad cook and must improve on her cooking skill without hurting her?
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What can you do if your husband cooks for himself but not for you ...What can you do if your husband cooks for himselfbut not for you? - Quora Answer (1 of 3): You can't change him. You can ask him why he never cooks foryou (of course this may open a lot of issuesthat are not on the table … yet .. so be sure you are ready to work on the issues).
"My husband only cares about himself": 10 tips if this is youJun 14, 20231) Encourage him to grow up One of the most common reasons for selfish husbands is selfish boys and teens. Let me explain: Boys who grow up in a culture or family environment that encourages them to value their opinion over others often become boorish in marriage.
Start cooking for yourself. Eat for yourself. He needs to start learning what it means to work in the kitchen. He can cook for himself. Tell him it's going to last an entire year. At the end of that year he can say whatever the fuck he wants about your cooking. No matter what he says to you, do not accept it as reality. No criticism.