PSYCHOLOGY & MENTAL HEALTH - Updated 1 hour ago

Help! My Adult Son Is Lazy And Unmotivated

YEET MAGAZINE

Jul 8, 2023 • 19 min read

A reader asked: "My friend’s son is a deadbeat. He’s 35, still lives at home, has never kept a job for longer than a year, buys things he can’t afford, and now his pregnant girlfriend is moving in.

He has a million excuses for everything that goes wrong. It’s never his fault! The problem: My friend and I play golf three times a week, and I can’t tolerate listening to him complain about his son anymore.

How do I tell him to wise up and stop supporting him? I don’t want to hurt my friend, but he needs to hear the truth."

Comments

He needs deliverance, some powers in the underworld is manipulating him, these are projections.

If you really can't stand it, just tell him. The ball may not be the only thing that gets teed off, so be sure it's worth it, before you open up. It may not go the way you hope.

Set boundaries with your friend. What happens In his family is none of your business. If the son's situation changes and you were the friend that advised him to turn against his son, y'all relationship is doomed.

When he complains, a friend's response would be, "How can I support you?"

Mind your own business, the dude is doin' just fine...

If you are truly his friend, just don’t have an opinion. He is venting. If you don’t like it then don’t golf with him.

“If I were in your situation…”

I don't see how it's your problem. It's his family let him handle it.

I love how it’s couched as “I’m just trying to help” when it’s so obviously about genuinely not liking his friend’s son. Yikes.
Perhaps remind the friend that “what he permits, he promotes”. If you have grown tiresome of the constant whine about his son, then I’d consider a new golfing partner. Nothing is worse than beating a dead horse.

Don’t get involved between the two of them. I know sometimes we just want to shake some sense into someone and it can be hard to bite our tongues, but just let him vent and remain friends.

Be upfront yet handle with care (probably the title of a record)

The only way to deal with it is talk about your kids every time he brings his son up. Keep comparing your kids' ways of dealing with situations with his son.

Something tells me his son needs encouragement, in other words never given any. Assuming his self esteem was doomed by his parents negativity about him and or others. Idk. Why else is he like this then?

You dont. You could tell him you are tired of hearing this but you dont issue dictates to him. In as much as he tells you, it is none of your business. Keep it that way.

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