Help! My Adult Son Is Lazy And Unmotivated

Help! My Adult Son Is Lazy And Unmotivated
Help! My Adult Son Is Lazy And Unmotivated

A reader asked: "My friend’s son is a deadbeat. He’s 35, still lives at home, has never kept a job for longer than a year, buys things he can’t afford, and now his pregnant girlfriend is moving in.

He has a million excuses for everything that goes wrong. It’s never his fault! The problem: My friend and I play golf three times a week, and I can’t tolerate listening to him complain about his son anymore.

How do I tell him to wise up and stop supporting him? I don’t want to hurt my friend, but he needs to hear the truth."


He  needs deliverance, some powers in the underworld is manipulating him, these are projections.

If you really can't stand it, just tell him. The ball may not be the only thing that gets teed off, so be sure it's worth it, before you open up. It may not go the way you hope.

Set boundaries with your friend. What happens In his family is none of your business. If the son's situation changes and you were the friend that advised him to turn against his son, y'all relationship is doomed.

When he complains, a friend's response would be, "How can I support you?"

Mind your own business, the dude is doin' just fine...

If you are truly his friend, just don’t have an opinion. He is venting. If you don’t like it then don’t golf with him.

“If I were in your situation…”

I don't see how it's your problem. It's his family let him handle it.

I love how it’s couched as “I’m just trying to help” when it’s so obviously about genuinely not liking his friend’s son. Yikes.
Perhaps remind the friend that “what he permits, he promotes”.  If you have grown tiresome of the constant whine about his son, then I’d consider a new golfing partner. Nothing is worse than beating a dead horse.

Don’t get involved between the two of them. I know sometimes we just want to shake some sense into someone and it can be hard to bite our tongues, but just let him vent and remain friends. 

Be upfront yet handle with care (probably the title of a record)

The only way to deal with it is talk about your kids every time he brings his son up. Keep comparing your kids' ways of dealing with situations with his son.

Something tells me his son needs encouragement, in other words never given any.  Assuming his self esteem was doomed by his parents negativity about him and or others. Idk.  Why else is he like this then?

You dont. You could tell him you are tired of hearing this but you dont issue dictates to him. In as much as he tells you, it is none of your business. Keep it that way. › us › blog › liking-the-child-you-love › 201906 › 3-ways-help-your-lazy-adult-child

3 Ways to Help Your "Lazy" Adult Child | Psychology Today1. Drop the "lazy" label. Okay, so what are you supposed to think if your adult child's behaviors include one of more of the bullet points above? Aren't these adult children truly lazy? Well,... › article-categories › child-behavior-problems › laziness-motivation

Motivating Lazy Children - What Motivates a Child? - Empowering Parents25 Comments Does your teen seem completely unmotivated? For parents of teens, the refrains of, "Whatever," and "I don't care," can become all too familiar. In this interview, teenage behavior expert Josh Shipp explains where your child's motivation really lies—and how you can tap into it. Q. › 12-reasons-your-child-seems-lazy-and-unmotivated-022109559.html

12 reasons your child seems lazy and unmotivated (and what you can do ...By Daniel Wong Everyone struggles with motivation at some point - children and teenagers are no exceptions. If your children start to exhibit signs like worsening grades, a lack of interest in... › us › blog › pride-and-joy › 201204 › he-s-not-motivated-part-i

He's Not Motivated: Part I | Psychology TodayMany parents believe that their child is "lazy." The answer to these questions is almost always, "Because he is discouraged." He may also be anxious or angry, and he is stuck in this bad mood....

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How to Motivate the Unmotivated Child | Empowering ParentsBy James Lehman, MSW 2186 Over the years, many parents have asked me why their kids aren't motivated and what they can do about it. How can you get your child to be more motivated? To do better in school? To even go to school? The important thing to remember is this: your child is motivated. › questions › 30056 › how-to-motivate-my-extremely-lazy-12-year-old

How to motivate my extremely lazy 12-year-old?My 12-year-old son is a good kid, but he is extremely unmotivated to do literally anything unless I or his mother are constantly riding him the whole time. As a young child, he was "easy" to raise because he could always entertain himself. › my-teenage-son-is-lazy-and-unmotivated

13 Ways To Motivate Your Lazy & Unmotivated Teenage SonMay 19, 202313 Ways To Motivate Your Lazy & Unmotivated Teenage Son 1. Lead by example. As a parent, you have a significant influence on your son'sbehavior and mindset. Leading by example is an effective way to motivate your son. Show him what motivation looks like by pursuing your own goals and passions. › blog › please-help-me-with-my-lazy-unmotivated-18yo-son-who-is-stuck-in-his-room-and-going-nowhere

Please help me with my lazy, unmotivated 18yo son who is stuck on the ...Please help me with my lazy, unmotivated 18yo sonwho is stuck on the couch and going nowhere Posted on July 30, 2019 It has only been in the past few years that I have started to hear from very frustrated parents about boys in their late teens who seem to be stuck or immobilised on their journey to manhood. › my-teenage-son-is-lazy-and-unmotivated

My Teenage Son Is Lazy And Unmotivated [This Is What You Need To Do]Mar 4, 2023March 4, 2023 Family As parents, we suffer to see our kids struggle with laziness and motivation. But when your adolescent son feels trapped, it's much more upsetting. As he becomes more independent, it's natural to want to assist him in developing the skills and motivation to succeed.

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How to Motivate a Child Who is Unmotivated to Do AnythingMay 6, 2023There are many reasons why a child is completely not motivated, but " lazy " is usually NOT one of them. Science tells us that a lack of motivation has something to do with the insufficient impact of neurotransmitters called dopamine 1 . Things that can lower the effectiveness of the dopamine system include: Stress 2 › people › family › how-to-parent-teen-boys

Is My Son Lazy? Parenting Tips for Teenage Boys | Art of ManlinessToday on the show, Dr. Price argues that the real reason many young men are unmotivated is not that they don't care about succeeding, but that they feel too much pressure to do so, and are scared of failing. We discuss why nagging and over-parenting simply exacerbates this issue, and how stepping back and giving boys more autonomy can help ... › how-to-deal-with-an-unmotivated-boy

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Child Lacks Motivation | Unmotivated Kids | Child Mind InstituteApr 27, 2023But Matthew Cruger, PhD, a psychologist at the Child Mind Institute who has worked with a lot of gifted children, is skeptical that a child's lack of motivation can be caused solely by giftedness. "I would expect the most gifted kids to find something compelling about the curriculum," Dr. Cruger says. If nothing in school piques a child ... › why-is-my-son-so-lazy

Your Son is not Lazy. Check These 15 Reasons Why He Appears UnmotivatedSadly, when your son doesn't have enough control, he will fail to limit the intake. Substance or Alcohol Abuse. People under the influence of drugs and alcohol tend to have trouble focusing. If one becomes addicted, the brain can be significantly affected, hence the unmotivated and dysfunctional behaviors. 14. › us › blog › the-unmotivated-teen

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How to Motivate a "Lazy" Teenager: ADHD Parenting Strategies - ADDitudeUse the log, also, like a bug zapper — to attract his noxious thoughts and to kill them. Here is one last thought: make sure he is engaged in some after-school activities. It does not matter what he does, but the more he is engaged after school, the greater the chance he will be engaged in school. › article › unmotivated-child-6-ways-get-child-going

How to Motivate your Child - Tips for Unmotivated ChildrenHere are six tips to help you influence them towards self-motivation. 1. Don't Let Your Anxiety Push Them To Get Motivated. You will only motivate them to resist you or to comply to calm you down because they want you to leave them alone. This won't motivate them as much as teaching them how to appease or resist you. › my-child-is-lazy

My Child Is Lazy. . How to motivate and unmotivated kid.Lazy feels like a fatal flaw by lacking motivation is a problem that you can try to solve. 2020 was the year of boredom and for many of us that has stretched in the winter and spring of 2021. To ease the boredom and then mental load as parents we relaxed lots of standards because we all felt a little stuck and in survivor mode. › motivation

Is My Teen Just Lazy? Diagnosing Motivation ProblemsDiagnosing Motivation Problems Show us a teenager who's unmotivated about school, and we'll show you a parent who's desperate to ignite a sense of purpose. Motivation isn't something that's easy to teach or to force kids to feel. It's a complicated psychological state that's rooted in a variety of factors. If you can relate, don't despair! › r › raisingkids › comments › e00bce › my_child_is_lazy_and_unmotivated_4_principles_to

My Child is Lazy and Unmotivated - 4 Principles to Bring Out ... - RedditMy Child is Lazy and Unmotivated - 4 Principles to Bring Out the Best in Them : r/raisingkids My child is lazy and unmotivated. What do I do? Do I punish him? Do I push him more? Do I let him roam free? Here are the best lessons I learned… Advertisement Coins 0 coins Premium Powerups Explore Gaming › us › blog › body-talk › 202105 › am-i-depressed-or-lazy

Am I Depressed or Lazy? | Psychology TodayKey points. Laziness is often a symptom of something more significant, like depression or anxiety, and it should not be something we judge harshly. When we take a closer look, the concept of ... › 7-reasons-your-child-seems-lazy-and-unmotivated-and-what-you-can-do-about-it

Dr. RJ - Teen Life CoachDec 26, 20213. They Have a Learning Disability A child with a learning disability may look like they are lazy and not trying. However, they may be acting out because they are overwhelmed and not getting the support they need. If you suspect your child has a learning disability, you should consult with their teachers to develop an appropriate course of action.3 › lazy-child-syndrome

Lazy Child Syndrome: How to Deal with a Lazy Child - Greensprings SchoolPerhaps there are better ways that can make your lazy child develop a positive attitude towards work; make him/her inquisitive about the world around; learn to take responsibility; and ultimately become a great achiever in his or her life endeavour. Motivation propels children and even adults to work. › news-events › news › unmotivated-lazy-moody-confused-14-year-old-boy

Do you have an unmotivated, lazy, moody, confused 14 year old boy?Do you have an unmotivated, lazy, moody, confused 14 year old boy? Posted July 21, 2016 Does this sound familiar? "The problem I am having is with my 14-year-old son who does not apply himself to his school work at all. He won't revise, study or plan at all. His grades are weak and failing in some major areas. › how-to-motivate-a-lazy-20-year-old

How to Motivate a Lazy 20 Year Old - Being a Good ParentOne of the main reasons people can become lazyand unmotivated is due to depression. In fact, research has shown that if you have symptoms of depression, you will most likely experience laziness and being unmotivated The reason for that is because depression is a hard mental battle that can drain someones energy and focus. › article › motivating-underachievers-part-i-when-your-child-says-i-dont-care

How to Motivate an Underachieving Child | Empowering ParentsHere are 9 steps to take when your underachieving child says "I don't care." 1. Identify What You Can Use for Rewards and Incentives › 7-things-you-can-start-doing-today-to-motivate-your-unmotivated-teen

7 Things You Can Start Doing Today to Motivate Your TeenAsk questions. Find out what's on your child's mind - what scares them, what worries them, what their passions are, and what makes them feel empowered. The more you tap into what your child is feeling, the more you can begin to understand why they're unmotivated and what they need in their life to spark drive and ambition. Believe in Your Child › r › Parenting › comments › 2vq90w › what_to_do_about_an_overly_lazy_son

What to do about an overly lazy son. : r/Parenting - RedditJust let the trash pile up. If it gets too much, put the trash in his room. But don't mention it, don't get mad at him, don't punish him. When he does take out the trash, simply thank him once, don't overly praise. For the yard work, I'd do it for him but "charge" him for the work out of his allowance. › advice › relationship › lazy-husband

5 Signs of a Lazy Husband and How to Deal With Him - Marriage.comThe realization isn't instant; it builds up until you finally accept 'my husband is lazy and unmotivated'. A report from a survey conducted by the Pew Research Center's Religious Landscape Study shared that 61% of the participants said that sharing household chores is very important for a successful marriage. › scmforum › topic › lazyunmotivated-child

Lazy/unmotivated child - Simply Charlotte MasonMy 9 yr old son continues to be lazy andunmotivated in school (and chores) unless it is something he wants to do. No matter how many times I send him back to redo something, he always seems to give the very least. As a parent, I find this frustrating. As a single parent, I find it sucks energy that I don't really have. › us › blog › liking-the-child-you-love › 202010 › 2-ways-motivate-your-struggling-adult-child

2 Ways to Motivate Your Struggling Adult ChildLecturing. Parents who intrusively tell their children how to solve their problems may lead children to believe that they have no control over their own lives. When parents jump in and give adult... › index.php?topic=854.0

Son-in-law seems unmotivated/lazy, now going to stay home take care of kidsNow have 3 boys: 4 yo, 2 yo & 9 mo. After Marines, SIL got an IT job, Stepdaughter was Asst. Volleyball coach. Last year Stepdaughter lost her job, then he lost his, all the time she was pregnant with 3 child. Stepdaughter got a job teaching High School, he continued on unemployment. While teaching, she got her Master's degree, and is now ... › understanding-your-childs-adhd-behavior

Understanding Your ADHD Child's Behavior: Reframing Negative ... - ADDitudeMay 18, 2022Lazy, rude, unmotivated, defiant, selfish, won't, should, and chooses are other phrases that I advise parents to reconsider and eradicate. Some of these Red Light Words imply a character flaw. When you call someone rude, you're attacking their personality and compassion for others — you're insinuating that they're a "bad" person. › r › Gifted › comments › b7cu07 › can_you_be_both_gifted_and_unmotivated_or_was

Can you be both gifted and unmotivated, or was there a mistake ... - RedditNo longer going home to my parents was necessary, as for months and months I noticed that any progress I made got immediately undone by being put back into this rusted social environment where everything I did was read through 'Graf is a lazy unmotivatedmentally unstable loser' lenses, and the pressure I'd worked hard to ban from my mind to ... › human-interest › 2018 › 04 › parenting-advice-for-a-family-with-an-unmotivated-teenager.html

Parenting advice for a family with an unmotivated teenager.My son, a high school freshman, is a very laid-back and relaxed 15-year-old. This was great when he was younger—rarely was there a tantrum or strong resistance—but as a teenager it makes me so... › advice › marriage › how-to-deal-with-a-lazy-wife-8-tips-to-get-her-to-be-more-active

Tips To Inspire A Lazy Wife To Be More Active - ReGainMay 17, 2023That is not somebody who is lazy. It's hard to work full time. No matter if you're working from home or at the office. Full time employment is taxing on the mind and the body. It's not lazy to want to relax. It's that she needs time to clear her head. It is important to remember that lazy is a negative term. Whether you stay at home ... › your-puzzling-gifted-child

Your Puzzling Gifted Child - Child DiagnosticsBored and Unmotivated. Many unmotivated, seemingly bored teenagers are struggling with focus/attention issues. Consider physical causes before you assume that they are just not trying, or don't care. In clinics across the country, physicians or naturopaths look for the physical reason for a child or teen's behavior. › r › Parenting › comments › vfbim7 › advice_on_what_to_do_with_an_unmotivated_21yearold

Advice on what to do with an unmotivated 21-year-old : r/Parenting - RedditI wouldn't try to tell him how to live... even though I agree he should be doing more to take care of himself, some people just want to do things their way and if you haven't gotten through to him already then he probably needs to just learn the hard way. › Deal-With-a-Lazy-Teenager

3 Ways to Deal With a Lazy Teenager - wikiHowApr 28, 20231. Listen and be patient with your teen. Avoid putting words in their mouth or interrupting them when they speak. Encourage your teen to talk by asking casual questions about their day, or how a test went at school. Note their responses and allow them to share their thoughts. [1] Have a two way conversation. › story › news › nation › 2023 › 07 › 03 › nj-man-hitman-plot-kill-teen › 70378312007

NJ sex-crime suspect sentenced for hiring hitman to kill 14-year-old5 days agoCherry Hill Courier-Post. 0:04. 1:03. A Kentucky man was sentenced to more than six years in prison for trying to arrange the murder of a 14-year-old boy to prevent the teen from testifying ... › forget-everything-youve-heard-this-is-the-right-way-to-motivate-your-child

Forget everything you've heard, this is the right way to motivate your ...1) Paying attention to your unmotivated child's interests can increase their motivation We all like doing things we find interesting and your children are no different. They will be more motivated when doing things they enjoy. How to motivate your unmotivatedchild • Observe them to find out where their interests lie4 › r › Parenting › comments › mcklln › my_teenager_is_failing_high_school

My teenager is failing high school. : r/Parenting - RedditCriscoCamping • My son is 15 and barely passing. He's always got B's, some A's. He also flipped out on my ex-wife and me and is not playing baseball this year. We have him in counseling and he started Prozac about two weeks ago. It might be the most worried I've ever been about anything. › life-and-style › health-family › my-teenage-son-is-lazy-and-selfish-1.10996?mode=amp

My teenage son is lazy and selfish - The Irish TimesQ I have a 16-year-old son who is driving us crazy with his carry-on. In September, he started in a new school, but in the first week he had a confrontation with the headmaster and the situation... › SearchResult › q › How-to-Deal-With-Laziness-in-Teenagers

How to Deal With Laziness in Teenagers | MyTroubledTeen.comTroubled Teen Questionnaire Take Test Find Out Your Teen's Mental Health Score The Teen Whisperer Sending Your Child to a School for Troubled Boys When Boys Go Bad - Sending Your Child to Schools for Troubled Boys It's a common mistake for some parents to compare the behavior of their teens to other... Read more Teenage Bipolar Disorder › your-gifted-child-isnt-lazy-and-neither-are-you

Your Gifted Child Isn't Lazy | Better Fit Psychology & ConsultingWithin this framework, "lazy" feelings or behavior indicate something is awry and needs attention. In my experience, it's common to discover that a gifted child who seems "lazy" is actually twice-exceptional and has ADHD, a learning disability, or autism.